SMALL EVERYDAY CHANGES THAT CAN MAKE YOUR LIFE BETTER!

 

Throughout my 40’s & as I approach my 50’s I have made some very positive & permanent changes in my life! At this age you’re now a fully fledged ‘grown up’ and certain things you may have done or put up with in your past needed to change for good.

I have found my 40’s a very positive experience. I had a bucket list of things I wanted to achieve, which I did, and a list of changes I needed to make in my life, which for the most part I did. It’s definitely a time to take charge of your own life and stop doing things to please other people and put your family and yourself first.

 

SAYING NO TO THINGS I DON’T WANT TO DO

I am a people pleaser and hate any kind of conflict so in the past I’ve definitely done things and agreed to things to please others even when I didn’t want to or it didn’t benefit my life. I fully appreciate in life we all have to do things we don’t want at times but often it was at the expense of time with my own family and not good for me mentally. Nowadays I stop and think hard before I say yes and, if it wont benefit my family or make me happy I wont do it. I’ve become much stronger and better at saying no as I go along.

 

WORKING ON MY CONFIDENCE

In my job I have to appear confident and in control all the time which I can do well but, underneath I wasn’t confident at all when I was younger. I constantly doubted my own abilities despite a great deal of success over the years. Yet I’d see people with far less ability, skills and qualifications than I, boasting and oozing confidence. So, I decided to take charge of my own thoughts and get some self-belief. It’s not easy at first but the more I got stern with myself and convinced myself I was more than capable of doing things the easier it got. Over the last few years I’ve taken on large projects that totally pushed me out of my comfort zone and were a huge success so I knew if I can do that I could do anything.

‘Self confidence comes from a trust within yourself, it’s a frame of mind’

 

KEEPING TOXIC PEOPLE OUT OF MY LIFE

It wouldn’t be a normal life if we didn’t have to deal with a few toxic people over the years trying to make your life hell & I’ve certainly had my fair share of them. Again, it was mainly in my 30’s when I had 3 different women at different times cause me a lot of upset at the time & it really affected certain periods of my life. Luckily things do work out for a reason and I saw them for who they were and removed them from my life. Karma is a wonderful thing as I kept my dignity throughout yet they all got their comeuppance in time.

 

MUCH MORE FAMILY TIME

My job takes up a lot of my time and the dance world in which I teach and run my own school is a very ‘full on’ business. If you’re not careful you can end up working 7 days a week and seeing more of your students than your own kids at times.

If lockdown 2020 taught me anything it’s to say no to parents who expect the earth from me and expect me to teach and answer calls & messages all hours of the day & week. Before my eyes my own kids are growing up very quickly and I refuse to miss all my weekends with them because I’m working.

 

WRITING & OTHER PASSION PROJECTS

Over the last 5 years I’ve discovered a deep passion for writing & I find it very cathartic. It’s something I can completely lose myself in and write about things away from work that I love and I’m passionate about. My main project this year is writing a set of children’s books that I’ve made a lot of progress with so I can’t wait to take them to the next level. I also enjoy Yoga, growing my own vegetables & herbs plus travel will always be my biggest passion. 

 

EXERCISING MORE & CHANGING MY EATING HABITS LONG TERM

Up to the age of 30 I was a professional dancer and exercised regularly then in my 30’s I had my children but got my figure back and stayed healthy.

I was fine up to 40 then a few bad habits crept in along with less exercise and a few pounds crept on. I’m not overweight but I’m quite a bit bigger than I’d like to be or feel comfortable with. 

Then I had that ‘moment’ when I saw a photograph of me that I really hated and decided I needed to make some life changes! I began Slimming World in my mid 40’s which worked for then as it’s a plan I could keep up easily and it suited the hours I work. I never felt hungry on it and I felt much healthier, less bloated and with much more energy. I was going to the gym before lockdown but nowadays I do my own workout at home which again has given me much more energy and I’m building my fitness levels back up.

I don’t follow slimming world anymore as I know what works for me & I try to eat a balanced diet. I’ve cut a lot of processed sugar out recently and I’m definitely feeling the benefits.  

 

PRACTICING GRATITUDE & DAILY ROUTINES & SWEAR BY

I’ve had a journal which I write in daily and I practice gratitude, mindfulness, visualisation & meditation on a daily basis which I find invaluable in my life. These morning practices help to keep me focused and calm and so much happier on a daily basis.  

 

 SELF CARE & REMOVING SELF GUILT FROM MY LIFE

I used to feel guilty immediately the minute I sat down and didn’t do anything or wasn’t working, I constantly had to be busy and on the go.

But all that does is create stress and anxiety which is no good for me or anyone else and my mantra now is ‘how can you be there to look after and help other people if you don’t look after yourself?’

So now, if I want to sit and watch something on TV, read a magazine or book, go shopping or go for my nails doing I refuse to feel guilty that I’m not working. No one’s going to thank me for running myself into the ground and consequently I feel much healthier and happier for it!